Time Capsule

June 28, 2009. 11:49am.
22 days and counting.

The trip is near at hand. I'm sure I've said it before, but I'll say it again - I cant believe how fast this time has gone. It has now been at least 6 months since I first heard rumblings about this trip and I can remember thinking that July 2009 was forever away. And yet, so quickly, here it is.

I am ready. So very ready. My life is ready for this.
I have all my necessary shots. My malaria medicine is actually sitting next to me here on the couch. As is my super stomach medicine. My passport is in the mail back to me. I have $1,000 left to raise in the next 11 days. After that, it's a simple wait 10 days, pack, leave.

Something probably a lot of people don't know about me is that I have a hidden place at work - I jot down notes throughout my workdays - when I start pondering things & I really should be working. So I write little notes and hide them away. It's always interesting to go back and read them. Just a bit ago, I found one of these notes. It's dated April 1, 2008. I think I was in DC when I wrote this, but reading it over again really struck my own curiosity. And so I thought I'd share it here.

"This afternoon I came across an interested website hosted by the UN - it's called 'Ten Stories The World Should Know More About, 2007'. One of the stories was about girl soldiers in Africa who have been kidnapped and forced to become sex slaves, which entails so much more than we could ever imagine. It is this group - these children who have been kidnapped and forced into a war that over and over grip my heart. It is beyond my understanding trying to relate to what they have gone through and the effects this will have on the rest of their lives. To even wrap my mind around this is nearly impossible.
When I read these stories, see the faces of beautiful children I'll never know, I can't help but wonder what life would look like if I traded in my cushy existence to somehow be a part of recovery. What if I was plucked from this world I know and was replanted in Northern Uganda. Could I learn a whole new culture? a new language? could I have a place in that world? What would it look like? It would be so very different. It would mean huge sacrifices. Huge sacrifices. But when I think about Matthew 16:25 ['...and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it'], I wonder if this is what that means? When I find myself often unsure of the purposes of life, relating to Solomon who said everything is meaningless, a chasing after the wind - I wonder if this is what that means.
For years I have toyed with these ideas. I always come back to 'How could I do that to my family? How could I abandon them?' and the ever growing, 'What would I do with all my stuff!?'. It amazes me, really, because of all places spiritually to be in, where I find myself now does not seem to be a spot to birth a life of/in ministry. Could it be that I needed to move away from the church to see the necessity of her work? Or, even more qustionable - how would it go - to somehow return to the church? It scares me I suppose.
Perhaps I should begin to pray for these questions. Which is not to say I'm picking up and moving to Uganda - but nor is it to say that I do not want to know the answers."

Needless to say... I don't remember every praying about these things.
I'm thankful that my prayers are not required for God to be working on my life, directing its ways. And I'm thankful for the freedom to ask questions, think about different things and let them stew rather than acting immediately and probably irrationally.
All that to say, finding this note [which really was odd to reread the first time and think 'hmm.. I wrote that? over a year ago?'] just makes me wonder what will happen through this trip. I know I've said to some people that I dont know what will come out of this trip. I'm hoping it stays that way because I like going and not having a purpose I'm trying to make happen through this. I'm just going because I knew back before Christmas that I was supposed to be going.
Anyway, just thought I'd share.

I will take a minute to say - if anyone reading this wants to make a financial donation - or you've been meaning to and just keep forgetting (which is like the story of my life, so no big deal!) but as I mentioned earlier, July 9th is the deadline. I'm eager to write the blog I already know is coming on July 10th which will be specifically about the money side of this process. So at least for now, adios :)

40 Days

Thursday. June 11, 2009. It's 8:05pm, still sunny outside and I'm already extremely tired.

[okay. well it was sunny. and as I was typing, I looked out and saw these clouds transforming. it was incredible. needless to say, I got distracted. It's now 9:23pm, dark outside, but I'm not feeling quite as tired.]

40 days from right now, though, I'll be in Uganda.

Today, 40 days feels extremely far away. Things feel kind of like a lull right now. Checking the mail isnt as exciting anymore (although my dad totally surprised me when I learned that his company is helping send me to Uganda. my dad's so great!). In the times when my excitement isnt as intense, it makes me wish I were around the other people I were going with - wishing that we were already friends & could get together planning. I mentioned before about some additional activities I'd just learned about and I wanted to fill you guys in.

Obviously, we'll be spending a good amount of time building beds. Also, there will be 4 other different things we'll fill in the time with. For one, a worship team - and since over half the team is from Nashville, I'm thinking this part will be pretty great musical wise. Secondly, there will be a recreation team. Not that I've ever been a pro soccer star, I look forward to getting my tail kicked by the kids we meet! Thirdly, there's an arts & crafts team who will hopefully plan something neat to engage the kids. And lastly [this is the one I think sounds TOTALLY fun], there's a Birthday team! From what I've been told, birthdays arent celebrated as much over there (maybe that's an understatement) and so we're going to plan a big bash.

Sound be an amazing week. I mean, I was excited just to go build beds - even if that was all we did. But clearly, it's going to be so much more.

As far as support goes, I believe I've just hit 70%. The money has been a great process. I've been hoping that this can be an opportunity for others to join me in this journey but also use the money I've been saving to make it happen as well. Obviously I've still got a ways to go (30% = $1,350) so if anyone's reading this and wants to contribute - still possible :) and still time - relatively speaking, the deadline is having the funds raised before I leave July 20th. Personally, I'd like to reach the goal maybe a tiny bit before that! And I still have support letters I can send out - if you want one, email me: theugandajourney@gmail.com with your address & I'll drop one in the mail.

One last thing - I've come to discover that many people I know imagined I'd be sleeping in a hut in Uganda, but turns out it looks like we're staying at this really neat place. Here's the website if you want to check it out: adonaiguesthouse.com

Every Day Still Leaves Me Excited!

Today, let's see, is June 6th. I cant believe 2009 is almost halfway over because the second half of the year means this trip is drawing incredibly closer. I will admit that this week I have found even myself surprised. I knew I was excited (obviously) for this trip, and yet, day after day I am finding myself equally distracted, continually on the lookout for something new about the trip - to get to learn about the people I'm going with, or the details of our stay, how God continues to bring people to this that will financially help make it possible. It amazes me still how many days I find myself grinning ear-to-ear for (what may seem to others) no apparent reason. In two weeks I'll get my last hepatitis shot and my malaria prescription. I guess I say that because I see this time leading up to the trip in phases. I am expecting that the wait for financial support will be my constant companion for most days prior to the trip, but the shots phase is nearly over. and as this phase ends, I am beginning to learn about the next phases. I am learning about great things we will supplement our time with - things besides building beds to show the kids we meet just how great we think they are, to show them love in so many different ways. it's exciting still, day after day! as more details come together, I'll let y'all know what other special things will be happening! until then, today should be a great fun day - I'm 'touring' Little Rock! trying to see the things that people who live here should know about! i think its the first time i've actually tried to come to know the place where I live... for the first time in the nearly 10 years its been since high school (wow!)